Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
