Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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