What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
how does that bad decision feel?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
