everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
