The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
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