It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize