This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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