We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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