If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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