Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
