...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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