AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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