Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I need water and some morals
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
