She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
