If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize