Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
