Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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