We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
