So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
