i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
