I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
