if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
did i just pee glitter
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize