Texts From Last Night

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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.

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  (763): Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never. http://tfl.nu/0ie8
  Replies (4) Good night (1510) Bad night (477)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.

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  (402): I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity. http://tfl.nu/6ok4
  Replies (17) Good night (2322) Bad night (680)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too

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  (919): Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too http://tfl.nu/1k8w
  Replies (40) Good night (810) Bad night (4321)
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  (209): View more from California

  do you want me to make hamburgers?

  (541): View more from Oregon

  i'm vegan

  (209): View more from California

  i'll put lettuce on them

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  (209): do you want me to make hamburgers? (541): i'm vegan (209): i'll put lettuce on them http://tfl.nu/hb72
  Replies (37) Good night (7631) Bad night (1029)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo

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  (610): Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo http://tfl.nu/aw10
  Replies (30) Good night (5873) Bad night (1072)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war

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  (916): rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war http://tfl.nu/t68o
  Replies (32) Good night (1006) Bad night (6650)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.

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  (404): she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating. http://tfl.nu/jrr4
  Replies (34) Good night (5842) Bad night (679)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.

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  (989): I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/vt43
  Replies (16) Good night (4547) Bad night (702)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college

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  (615): Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college http://tfl.nu/1jn9
  Replies (7) Good night (5099) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.

  (512): View more from Texas

  There are margaritas in the freezer still.

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  (210): I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life. (512): There are margaritas in the freezer still. http://tfl.nu/0xfi
  Replies (16) Good night (5460) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.

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  (352): Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa. http://tfl.nu/e1sr
  Replies (26) Good night (6769) Bad night (1499)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.

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  (309): Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me. http://tfl.nu/c51e
  Replies (7) Good night (1098) Bad night (2188)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.

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  (510): listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'. http://tfl.nu/236r
  Replies (22) Good night (3481) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?

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  (630): How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club? http://tfl.nu/moii
  Replies (4) Good night (1072) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house

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  (336): Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house http://tfl.nu/ap4l
  Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (256)

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