I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?