I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize