Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
