Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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