You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
