They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
