So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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