Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
