Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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