Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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