Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
