I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
