Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
