I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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