My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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