He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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