The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
