Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
