I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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