i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
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