she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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