Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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