I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
