There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
