It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
