i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
