I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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