I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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